Sunday, November 9, 2008

Growing Up Sucks...and How to Make Your Very Own Street Walker Barbie!

You know what I hate?


That I had to grow up.


Not that I necessarily grew “up”…because I am glad that my height advanced beyond the 2 foot I was when I initially popped out. I am just sad that I had to stop being a kid. I was looking at the Wish Book today at toys with my mom…I told her that I missed playing with Barbie Dolls. In fact, I think I would still play with them if it were socially accepted.


I loved those things! I loved the tiny little shoes for her freakish tippy toe feet, the fabulous street walker clothing, the lack of genitalia, Ken’s plastic hair, and all the kick ass home furnishings and appliances. I absolutely loved that girl!!! Me and my sister would play with them and I would always have to be Skipper. She had the smaller boobs. I wasn’t worth of Barbie and her plastic double D’s. Me and my sister also loved to, um, style Barbie’s hair. In a nutshell, we liked to give Barbie a bowl-cut. If you aren’t familiar with the fabulous hair style of the late 80’s and the early 90’s, let me lay it down for you. This hair style consisted of a short bob of sorts that made it appear like you had a bowl lying on your head while the stylist (your mother in your bathroom) cut the hair. So here comes Barbie, looking fab with her bowl-cut hair, at home painted nails (we also liked to give her manicures with our thick and sticky old Wet-n-Wild nail polish), hooker looking tube dress made out of one of my old ruffled socks (seriously, children’s socks made the best tube dresses), crazy hot pink tennis shoes that are still heeled for some reason, one leg that won’t actually straighten out anymore, and I wonder to myself…when will I have kids so I can play with these bitches again!?!?!


My luck, my kid wouldn’t let me play because I kept messing up her Barbie’s.


On a funny note, after reading all of this…I can now see in every way…how Barbie helped me pick my profession. Barbie Bowl-Cuts, Tube Sock Hooker Dresses, and the all pink dream house kitchen totally equals up to Home Ec Teacher.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

So wish I still had my Barbies! Now I can't buy dolls cause I have 2 boys! Pst you've been tagged! Check out my blog for more info!

Anonymous said...

What is so funny, is you blog this the very day before I decide to go Barbie Doll House Crazy for The Kid's Christmas Present!

Btw, I'm digging through our old barbies and furniture tomorrow at Grannies.....

It's gonna Rock Solid! I'm so excited I don't think I'll sleep!!!

Campbell Jane said...

You have a big present on my blog! Stop by and pick it up!
Many Blessings
Janet