Let’s face it, us dog people are crazy! What other type of person goes around talking about balls, and anal glands, and carries bags around to pick up poop with. I have two dogs, Won-Ton, a chow mix and Skeeter, a dachshund mix. Won-Ton is a lover of everyone, and Skeeter is a momma’s boy with a severe hatred of his dad, Mr. Biggs.
My dog knows that when his dad pisses him off the best revenge is to poop in his aquarium room, right in front of the tank. It never fails. That right there, is pure genius. Forget helping the blind, opening doors for me, or fetching a beer, my dog knows revenge. Sometimes I wonder what my dogs are actually thinking…and saying about me when I am not around. Call me crazy all you want. I think that if he knows what to do when he is angry, I am sure they sit around and talk trash when I am at work…
Skeeter – “Did you see that big one I laid in dad’s room last night? That will teach him to tease me with the last Doritos!”
Won-Ton – “Dude, you keep doing that and he will keep blaming his farts on you.”
Skeet – “That’s true. Man does he have some bad ones! What does he eat! I can’t see what mom sees in him!”
Won – “Hey, don’t complain! The kibble has gotten a lot better since we moved here…and the backyard is always full of rabbits!”
Skeet – “Plus we have that crazy cat to chase! “
Won – “Man, that cat is full of crap. Did you see how it chewed up mom’s shoe and acted like we did it! I am going to bite it in the ass the next time it comes out from under that bed!”
Skeet – “And it gets to sleep in the bed while we have to sleep down here on the couch. That is pure BS.”
Won – “Oh God, there they go again!”
Skeet – “I know! They get my balls taken off…but no, not dad!”
Won – “Hey, I feel you! I know, let’s go mess with them!”
Skeet – “OK! I will put my cold nose on dad’s butt, and you jump on the bed and get in mom’s hair; she hates that!”
Dad – “WOAHHH!!!!”
Can you tell that Mr. Biggs is none to fond of the pups sometimes? I think with opposable thumbs, Skeeter could take over the world…
On another note...I am having a huge sale in my store! Buy 4 items or more and get 20% off! Also, there are tons of items I just marked for clearance...these are available at a huge savings!